It's a Britney Pitch!

Full disclosure: when was just a young lad I had a major crush on Britney Spears. I thought she was

"I"ll never tell, tell on myself, but I hope she buys my perfume." :)

awesome. Very attractive, and I was about 15 when she came on the scene. I was going to marry that girl. Unfortunately a few people beat me to the punch. I still love Britney. She is no stranger to endorsements. When I was 16 and could drive I went to 7-11 with my friend Shawn Haynes to get the official Britney Spears World Tour Poster and Cup Brought to you by Pepsi…for those who think young. In fact I still have that poster in my closet along with all of my Britney memorabilia. I’d never admit this on my professional blog, but you can still catch me jamming to Ms. Spears on my iPod whilst driving to work. I don’t really watch videos anymore. Unless someone has mounted a wrecking ball I probably won’t watch it. I come from a time when Carson Daily would tell me what videos to watch. Since that channel sticks to teen pregnancy now, I’ll just listen to music instead of watching. However, a recent Buzzfeed article opened my eyes to a fairly recent video by Ms. Spears. Let’s just say it’s a bit of a “circus.”

The article showed scenes from every video in which Britney used perfume. As her song “Perfume” was stuck in my head that day..and every day since then, I thought I’d give it a click. The number one gif on that list was from “Hold it Against Me.” A great song. I downloaded it legally through me on my iPhone and really enjoy it. The video as a whole is a neat concept. It has everything: Britney fighting evil Britney, Technicolor Dream Coats, and Ms. Spears dancing in front of a wall of former Britney videos. Oh, it also has a metric ton of product placement. Let’s examine what is seen in this video.

First of all you see Britney with a bottle of her signature perfume. Not a problem right? I want Britney to wear her signature scent…that way I can buy for my girlfriend and play make believe. But…holy super zoom Batman! We get an extreme close up of that bottle. A little unnecessary, but ok. We need to be able to see the name so as to purchase it later at Macy’s. This really sets the tone for the rest of the video. There are extreme close ups of several other products. I was not sure at one point if I was watching a video or a very long over-produced commercial…with lots of paint.

The next product is some kind of makeup. I don’t know much about makeup. It looks like something for your eyes. I did not see a brand on it, but I still think its product placement. It could be from her line, or Lorea’l, but I don’t think she endorses them anymore.  All I know is we got an extreme close up. So yay unidentified makeup product.

I am writing this blog on a Toshiba laptop. “The official unofficial technology partner of Label Out.” I am surprised I was able to watch the “Hold it Against Me” video though. The reason is simple. Sony computers and televisions appear at least 20 times in this thing. That includes the extreme close up you see to the left. That picture is from the actual video. I did not crop it or zoom. A little in your face Britney Jean. While I have some issues with how blatant these logos appear in the video, it is acceptable because Britney is an RCA Recording Artist. RCA Records is owned by Sony-BMG, and they would not put any other TV, computer or camera in their video.

The worst party foul comes from a little dating site that is in this video. No not Christian Mingle, but

rather Plenty of Fish. Here is the thing. This website appears in the video so many times that its ridiculous. I mean season nine of “The Office” ridiculous! But she uses a Sony computer to access the site.  First of all it’s CANADIAN! Second of all, let’s pretend Britney Spears uses a dating site…do you think she would use the RC Cola of dating sites? Probably not. Also, why would Britney use a dating site? Also, look at her past. Hey girl, if you go on Plenty of Fish you can such winners as KFed. And that poor fella she married and divorced quicker than it took me to watch season 2 of “Orange is the New Black.” Overall the video is a cool concept executed poorly by some questionable product placement.

In her second video ever, Britney appeared next to a BMW that had a blacked out logo. Oh if young Britney could look into the future and see what has occurred in almost two decades? I still Love Ms. Spears. I grew up with her music. (I am honest enough to admit that.) I simply prefer a video lie “Everytime” that is much more honest.